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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Ok, some of you have read the last story of ninja coon.

basically this racoon that frequents my apartment tried to attack me with ninja moves one night, about a year ago. original story http://www.d-series.org/forums/showthread.php?t=65765

Well, he (she, im noticing now) is back!

Im out having a smoke when I see the racoon near my girls Scion, then i see 3 baby racoons. all bouncing off of trees, and the scion like they are recreating a matrix fight scene.

Its pretty cool, Once bounces off a tree and lands on the other one, then both roll on the ground, and then in lay there for a sec, and in slow motion get up and look around.

So I thought, hmm maybe I can talk to them, make some noise and they will go to the trash cans instead of coming upstairs.

Nope, it was more like "HEY whats this motherfucker saying to me, HEY KIDS LETS KICK THIS GUYS ASS"

well shit, I watch the mom come to the bottom of the stairs, and then without warning I see the babies come around here like a stampede, they are rushing me.

"AWW WTF"

no ninja moves this time, no trying to scare me with her "technique" she just called her kids on me.

They come running up the stairs and I stand my ground and say "HEY, WTF are you doing, do you realize i will cunt punt you?"

they stop, but not for long. long enough to realize they outnumber me 4 to 1.

Like retarded kids they just look down and start rumbling up the stairs again, not even looking where they are going or how close they are getting.

One stops within feet of me, the looks up like "wait, YOUR STILL HERE.... YOU WANT SOME?!"

stands up and starts crossing his arms in the NINJA MOVES his mom did to me not more than a year ago!

"AWW shit she taught them, GOD DAMN YOU NINJA COON!"

im in awe of the technique that this young racoon is displaying, he has flawless form. but its a distraction, as i realize that his brothers(or sisters) are also now on the step right infront of me, standing and flaunting a variety of hand gestures, varying styles it seems. Almost like they have combined Ninja coon, and drunken boxing into one seamless coon-quan-do.

BUT, BUT..... this was just a distraction, i was unaware the entire time that youngster 4 (so that makes 5 total with mom) is flanking me from behind.

"Mother fucker, he came up the other stairs and is trying to get the drop on me!"

so im stuck, my door right infront of me, and my only way out it seems. but i dont want to move yet, i am captivated by the ballet i see before me. the skills these racoons are displaying to me is impressive. I look down the stairs to see the mom racoon, just watching, almost smiling.

I then open my door and sneak inside, just to hear and see all 4 baby ninja coons jump at the screen door and tumble off.

wow.... who knew the technique could be passed on. and that it could be executed so well in such young racoons.

till we meet again ninja coons! till we meet again. your technique is impressive, but next time i see you, i will be wearing shoes!
 

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Formally known as SPONSOREDCRX
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:bigrofl:

that shit was funny. should have got some pics some how.
 

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stoner adventures vol 1
 

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paintball gun for the own
I got rushed by a racoon on my buddies back porch one time and I lit his ass up with a fully auto airsoft gun. He yelped like AIIIIEEEEEE then ran away... it was pretty funny as far as animal cruelty in self defense goes LOL.
 

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Resident Gunsmith & Duracoater
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pornstarSR said:
Almost like they have combined Ninja coon, and drunken boxing into one seamless coon-quan-do.
dude that has to be the best line i have ever heard....

snap some pics of the ambush next time....
 

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"Wild Bush Appeared!"
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You got attacked by little kids? Why don't you get yourself a "ninja" outfit so that next time the coons come after you you can flaunt your skills. Haha.
 

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You got attacked by little kids? Why don't you get yourself a "ninja" outfit so that next time the coons come after you you can flaunt your skills. Haha.
You missed the first installment, there's no way you could possibly understand.
 

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All these fucking racoons learning martial arts. First a racoon runs up a broom and jacks our homies face up, and now we have the 5 teenage mutant ninja coons going after our members. WTF? Just WTF? I bet he came at you all like

 

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All these fucking racoons learning martial arts. First a racoon runs up a broom and jacks our homies face up, and now we have the 5 teenage mutant ninja coons going after our members. WTF? Just WTF? I bet he came at you all like

ROFL... dude that is so wrong....


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH:IHI:
 

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ROFL... dude that is so wrong....


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH:IHI:
best part is i searched ninja racoon and voila I get that with caption already included LOL it was just too easy.
 
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